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After reading and researching thousands of books Marvin Jones Jr Lions Jersey , articles and other resources on communication, first impressions, networking and conversation, I've learned one thing: none of them address what approachability means. Or maybe they just don't take the time to define it, stress its importance and offer suggestions on how to maximize it.


That research was my impetus for writing The Power of Approachability. I wanted to give people a clear picture of what the idea meant, along with many small tips and suggestions to put that idea to use ? one conversation at a time.


So Barry Sanders Lions Jersey , straight from the pages of the book, here are my Top Ten Ways to Maximize Your Approachability.


Ready to Engage
The word approachability derives from the Latin verb appropriare, which means 'to come nearer to.? Interesting. It doesn't say anything about the approach-er or the approach-ee. Just 'to come nearer to.? So the first idea to remember is that approachability is a two way street. It's both you stepping onto someone else's front porch; and you inviting someone to step onto your front porch.


Although this article will address both sides of the street, here's an example of the former. When you arrive at a meeting, event, party or anywhere in which many conversations will take place Austin Bryant Authentic Jersey , prepare yourself. Be 'ready to engage? with conversation topics, questions and stories in the back of your mind ready to go as soon as you meet someone. This will help you avoid those awkward ?How's the weather? type of discussions.


CPI
This acronym stands for the Common Point of Interest. It's an essential element to every conversation and interaction. Your duty, as you meet new people, or even as you talk with those you already know, is to discover the CPI as soon as possible. It connects people to you. It allows them to feel more comfortable talking to you. And it increases your approachability inasmuch as people will be magnetized to you due to the commonality you share.


A great tip is to ask the right type of questions. Similar to our first example, 'ready to engage Will Harris Authentic Jersey ,? you don't want to ask people about the weather. You can do better than that! Instead, ask questions that begin with ?What's your favorite?? ?Tell me the best?? or ?When was the last time?? The CPI is almost guaranteed to be discovered.


Flavored Answers
In the event that one of those Fruitless Questions like ?How's it going?? ?What's up?? or ?How are you?? comes up, don't fall into the F.I.N.E. trap. In fact, fine isn't even a word. No, seriously! I looked the word up in 23 different dictionaries and it wasn't listed! Upon further research I discovered that F.I.N.E. is an acronym for ?Feelings I'm Not Expressing.?


A great technique is to offer a Flavored Answer to a Fruitless Question. Instead of ?fine,? try ?Amazing!? ?Any better and I'd be twins!? or ?Everything is beautiful.? Your conversation partner will instantly change his or her demeanor as they smile and Jahlani Tavai Authentic Jersey , most of the time, inquirer further to find out what made you say that answer. Because nobody expects it. And offering a true response to magnify the way you feel is a perfect way to share yourself with others, or 'make yourself personally available? to others.


Don't Cross Your Arms
Even if it's cold, even if you're bored, even if you're tired and don't want to be there ? don't cross your arms. It's such a simple, subconscious non-verbal cue that too many people practice and it hinders their approachability.


As a result T.J. Hockenson Authentic Jersey , people won't want to ?bother? you. They will form the impression that you are defensive, nervous, judgmental, close minded or skeptical. Honestly, would you want to approach someone like that? I know I wouldn't.


Don't Assume
Every time you assume, you end up making an ? yeah Kenny Golladay Authentic Jersey , yeah, yeah ? we get it. Or do we? How many times have we uttered one of the following sentences, only to be stricken with a terrible case of Foot-In-Mouth Disease?


You must be new here? How's work going? Do you remember me?


Remember, just because someone walks in whom you've never seen before ? doesn't mean he's new. Or just because you're at a networking meeting ? doesn't mean everyone in attendance has a job. And believe me, not everyone you remember ? remembers you.


Approachability is a function of comfort, so it's important to sidestep these moments of embarrassment with Success Sentences. These are phrases that allow the other person to offer you're the information you need to know. Examples include Jarrad Davis Authentic Jersey , ?I'm not sure we've met before,? ?What are you working on this week?? and ?I'm Scott, we met last month at the Chamber meeting.?


Options for Communication
Your friends, colleagues, customers and coworkers will chose to communicate with you in different ways. Some will choose face to face, some will email Kerryon Johnson Authentic Jersey , others will call, while others will do a little of everything. The bottom line is: make all of them available. On your business cards, email signatures, websites or marketing materials, let people know that can get in touch with you in whatever manner they choose. Sure, you might prefer email. But what matters most is the comfort of the other person and their ability to communicate effectively.